Posted on 6/14/10
Transferred to WordPress 3/31/14

Living in a household with cats is something that only cat owners can truly appreciate. It’s wildly entertaining, but also mutually gratifying and a lot of times, very comforting. On the flip side, it can also require the occasional hairball extraction or clean up, which is not a lovely experience. Also, with any pet there are times of wrangling them into pet carriers or as free agents, into your car, for their VET appointments. And, what usually comes along with that is the ever-eventful experience of administering medications. The oral tablets are particularly fun (sarcasm with a huge helping of I’m going to dropkick this cat out the upstairs bathroom window, intended).

Most recently we had to take one of our cats, Molly (who we originally named Nermal – a story for another day if anyone wants to hear that one) to the VET due to some skin irritation that caused her to lick and bite raw, the skin on her right hind leg and belly. Picture this: 15 pound ball of orange fur with front paws super-glue-gripped onto the outside edge of the cat carrier – not letting go for anything. It took two of us. Hubby held the carrier and I held the very unhappy kitty’s front paws together whilst shoving her lard ass into the carrier, producing one very frightened feline. Her meows became bawls and her eyes as big as saucers. We both felt horrible (as usual). I threw her a few treats but that didn’t help. She still bawled. I softened my voice and spoke to her in motherese, telling her that everything was going to be OK and if she could just trust we were doing this to help her, she would feel much better. No dice. Bawl! Bawl! Bawl!

Anyway – off she and hubby went. They were home in a few hours with a good report, a Prednisone shot while there (THANK GOD IN HEAVEN!!!) and a spray that helps to soothe the sore spots. We’re supposed to spray and brush that in, which oddly, is something she really enjoys. 🙂

For the most part, cats are extremely easy to care for, and much like most household appliances these days, they are self cleaning and have an array of functionality and purpose. Though they don’t add value to your home, they are certainly nice to have, especially on cold rainy days when your toes are cold and they target your feet as their lounging area of choice for the afternoon. 🙂 Oh and by the way, you are expected to consider that a Divine gift from “Them”.

Cat with Halo

One of the “functions” of a cat is to remind you when it is time to eat, lest you forget, during their ritualistic obstacle course- prance between your legs as you’re heading towards the kitchen. It’s a wonder you don’t kill them, before feigning dying of starvation, because how in the world do you not step on them when they do that?!

We feed ours in the basement, where they also poop, pee and sleep for the night – but that’s a whole story in and of itself – the sleeping in the basement thing. There is a reason, which I will delight in sharing with you in a bit. Some cats meow unabashedly and repeatedly until you plop their tasty morsels in their bowl. It’s much like the Chinese water torture really. You just want it to stop but it won’t until you fill the bowl with sustenance.

Another function we’ve had the misfortune of experiencing is their resolute desire to play at oh say, 3 or 4 o’clock in the morning. I don’t know about you, but my body is usually in the most delicious state of unconsciousness around that time. Zoe, our black and white cat and also our oldest, has quite the personality (s) – and YES that “(s)” was intentional. Zoe owned my husband (yup – intentional) before we met and when we were dating we talked on the phone alot. He’d call to say goodnight after he crawled into bed. Usually, Zoe was up to either no good or distracting him enough that he would have to share with me what she was doing because it was usually funny enough to get a laugh (major brownie points for the new boyfriend). One night, he shared with me that she had awakened him in the middle of the night by batting at the springy doorstop thing that keeps the door from hitting the wall. He described the sound and I knew exactly what he was talking about… that, “BOING, BOING, BOING” springy sound. She would do it over-and-over-again, until finally he removed the spring entirely so she couldn’t wake him anymore. He called it her “Doorstop Symphony in F.U. Major”. I laughed pretty hard at that one. His take on her antics were that she was making all the ruckus because he was, well, not paying attention to her. How dare he not give her all the love and attention she required at that very moment when the clock struck 3:00 a.m. What a negligent master.

She’d also carry on by deliberately knocking, one-by-one, small items off the nightstand. She still does this from time to time when we are brainless enough to let her stay in the main house during the night. She’ll look right at you.  Pause.  Take her paw and swat at something. Look back at you. Swat a second thing and knock it down, by which time, one of us is usually diving toward her as she’s high-tailing it down the hallway.  Smart cat.

This is why the cats go in the basement at night. We’d get no sleep if we left them out and it would largely be Zoe pulling the stunts. Though Banshee (who we also call Whippy, because when she’s in her love zone and all affectionate, her tails whips about feverishly, like a puppy wagging their tail. So cute) is another story with the early morning antics. She transforms into “jungle kitty” in the middle of the night. If she gets a hold of “cracky the rat”, a catnip stuffed mouse she likes to carry around in her mouth, all manner of unearthly sounds come from that cat. It’s very disturbing. Family circus is what I call all of this. And when all THREE of them get to running around and chasing each other – it’s just nuts. Oh, and it happens – quite frequently.  Which is why I have a wine cabinet.

NOTE: Thank you Niki Collier (my cousin) in Missouri for encouraging me to write about this. It was a Skype shot of Zoe acting like ZOE one day that prompted her to do so! 🙂 Love you cuz…I hope you enjoyed reading.

Zoe in Dishwasher View 2 Zoe in my purse after gum Zoe nudging Nay for love 025 159 Banshee In Cat Condo Zoe Sprawled Out At Fireplace IMG_0579 081 IMG_0728 Zoe playing with ribbon B


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